When I started the polls on my site, I included heterosexuality and homosexuality. I completely left out bisexuality. Not on purpose, mind you. I just forgot. When I realized this, it was too late to change the poll because people had already voted. So please, if any of you reading this fall into the spectrum of bisexuality, forgive me.
However, it wasn't long before I realized I was being a coward. Too afraid to face the real truth that I was pretty much as gay as they come. I have no interest in intimate relationships with women. In fact, female sexuality is a bit hard for me to swallow most of the time. I am not disgusted by the female form... but just don't show me anything sexual. Anyway, many, like me, claim bisexuality for a time because it is easier than claiming homosexuality.
Having said that, there are true bisexuals walking among us. I didn't believe it until having met some. One of my good friends is bisexual. Let me say how difficult I imagine being a bisexual would be. Like I said before, I don't understand it. I have heard some people describe it like this:
There are times in my life when I am noticing a lot more females and feel the draw to be with a girl while I almost entirely ignore males. Then, after a time (usually months, and sometimes years), all of a sudden, it switches and I find myself checking out males almost exclusively.One of my friends is in a gay relationship. At one point, while he was in the relationship, he was very much interested in women. He didn't care to check out guys at all. But he stayed committed and eventually that period passed.
Can you imagine the frustration? I certainly feel like my orientation is much easier to deal with than bisexuality would be. I'm not sure how it works. Can a true bisexual be completely satisfied in a partnership with one member of one gender? If so, I'd imagine that many bisexuals choose the socially acceptable orientation and live life as a heterosexual (I certainly would).
In my research about changing orientation, I have found that most "success" cases are bisexuals and that they learn to suppress the homosexual desires and embrace the heterosexual ones. They learn to find fulfillment in a heterosexual relationship. On the other hand, if there are no heterosexual desires to begin with (and I don't mean "I wish I was straight" I mean, "wow, I'd really like to make out with that girl/boy"), it hasn't proven possible to create those heterosexual feelings to replace the homosexual ones.
Anyway, to all my bisexual brothers and sisters out there- know that you are loved and thought of. I hope that my understanding about your sexuality will continue to grow and that you find the tools you need to help guide you through your life. Regardless of the path you take, I hope you feel my support.